11.18.2009

Lessons on a Rainy Morning

Dear Lisa,

I know you're new to this whole train commute thing, so you get a little wiggle room on this one. However, your morning performance was pitiful. You must take weather seriously if you intend to make it through the winter. A rainy day like this is not to be taken lightly.

Here are some lessons for you to keep in mind moving forward:

1. When you're watching the news in the morning, LISTEN to your weatherman and RETAIN the information he shares.

2. The weather does not stay the same as it is when you leave the house in the morning. Just because it isn't raining at that moment doesn't mean it won't be raining later.

3. Rain = Umbrella. Come on now, this is a basic one. You have plenty of umbrellas in your umbrella holder by the front door. A hood is not the same thing.

4. Rain = Rain boots. You have two pairs sitting in your closet. Your running shoes will thank you next time, as will your feet.

5. Wearing "dry clean only" pants the morning after you get them back from the dry cleaner is never a good idea on a rainy day.

6. Switch leather purse for one of the array of other more responsible choices in your closet. You owe Michael Kors an apology.

7. Wear your contacts on a rainy day. You looked like a cooped up serial killer when you ordered your latte over foggy, wet glasses this morning.

Please take this advice seriously. Winter is a moment away and you've got months of this ahead of you. Buy yourself a new hat now (you need one).

Sincerely,
Chicago Weather

2 comments:

Matt Hanneman said...

Number 7 is my favorite. This list can work for me too...I bought a hat on Monday while running errands, but I will say, I carry an umbrella every day because I'm a huge nerd.

Evan said...

Hey Nerd...
Rain is usually accompanied by wind and lightning. This is why I refuse to umbrella myself - why would I walk around with a sail on the top of my metal pole that I'm holding in the air if there is wind and lightning. Sometimes when I swim I like to bring an anchor so I don't drift too far from shore.

Also - I will keep using my leather purse...cows are waterproof, aren't they?